off balance

last week i had some hideous virus that mutated into bronchitis and a sinus infection. i had to use 5 days of time off from work which made me feel like crying. ugh. i still dont feel GREAT but i am definitely back among the living. sorta.

something weird is happening in the universe though, im not the only one reporting it. people i know that are usually solid as a rock seem to be on rather shaky ground. everyone seems really disconnected and aggro (myself included). for instance, my son is in the BEST mood hes ever been in that i can remember in his entire life (he has recently been hanging out with a lovely young woman) and i can barely be nice to him. its like his happiness is making me mad..?!? i keep thinking myself out of it, saying to myself, this is crazy...why be mean when he is so happy? then i came home from work and found all of his fingernail clippings in my freshly cleaned bathroom sink and i sent him a text that said "sleep with one eye open". and i meant it.

message

The universe has been sending me messages. Not the easy yell in your ear kind, the confusing, subliminal not exactly literal kind. I think. Pretty sure anyway.

Although the message is hopeful and positive and loving, it's not what I want right now. I want what I want when I want it, and when I want it and everything else is NOW. Such a joke, like anything happens according to MY timeframe....oh hahahahaha back at you Universe, you big fucking joker.